My lovely lovely Princi-pal

I walk into these wide, long halls, the walls are peeling and cracked, like the smiles on their faces.
It's all so fake I tell you!
As if they know whats good for us, they set rules, guidelines, and expectations.
But you look at me with this fake, cracked smile.
Like you think you know the truth but we both know you don't.
You don't get what goes on, even in this place!
What my status is, and how well I'm doing.
You care about the football stars.
and buy them new shoes.
Or your family and the vacations you take,
but I was here the whole time.
Wishing you'd notice.
That I'm not just another face, William T. Sprinkles,
I am a human being,
with goals just like you.
But I am a head without a face, wandering this place.
Just like everyone else
I look the same to you.
So before you come to me with rules, guidelines and expectations,
remember,
The girl with holes in her jeans, may not have any other jeans to wear
and the boy who sleeps in class
May have trouble sleeping at night,
because his room is to cold and his heart is to heavy.
But go ahead and go home to your family,
with your little bow tie, and balloon popping hair.
I'll be here when your ready to draw a face on me.

I saw 6 daisies                                                                   

All in a row

Like the golden sun, they glowed

But one little daisy,

In that row

Was ashamed of its petals

And would not show

I say “Oh little daisy! You’re so bright, your petals glow so much, why do you hide from my sight?”

“The sun is too bright,

And I am to mellow

I hate that my petals

Are this pasty yellow

I wish to be black,

Like the night sky

And my petals will shine with dew

Like the stars in the dark night.”

The other 5 daisies,

Turned with ignorance

So, I took the shunned daisy home

And painted it black

Sometimes I think really hard about what people think of me.

It's like all anyone ever wants in the world is acceptance, to fit in. To know someone actually likes them being there, and people my age really stress out about this.

Being an 18 year old girl, it shows me that once high school is over, no one will care what jeans you wore, or who went to the best parties. Because your in the real world now and no gives a shit about you, only if you pay your bills on time.

And honestly, it makes me think life really sucks. 

Because honestly, it does. 

Today I noticed that people like to talk badly about others, I guess because of jealousy.

I was told some people in my class think I'm just a huge slut, well if anyone would care to know or need to be enlightened on this, I don't just let people use me. Unlike some people I know, I value my body, and don't suck dick for some new clothes. Live the way you want, but get your facts strait before you go runnin your mouth because I will check you. If you are reading this then, if your not as stupid as I'm assuming, then you'll piece it together.

Can't we all just get along?

All anyone cares about anymore is approval of or peers, and the clothes on your back. Well screw the system, and screw the clothes. I am and always will be, who I am, and will never try to change who I am for anyone, or attempt to get people to like me for something I'm not. 

Don't let others change you. No matter how ghetto, Proper, or slutty you are, If you enjoy being who you are, then by all means live it up. 

Stay away from liars, and sluts. Because they go hand in hand, Honesty is everything to me. I would want the knitty gritty truth over a lie that would make me feel better any day. 

People just need to keep my name out of their mouth or I will

go in swingin.

so I have lived in 5 different places in the past 11 months.

and I gotta say it, it was kind of fun in a way but at the same time, don't ever become homeless. Depend on your self. not knowing where you'll be laying your head at night is a terrifying, thrilling, crazy feeling.

Don't ever rely on anyone but yourself, because friends these days suck.

our generation is full of bullshit people who turn right around and stab you in the back.

trust the people you love, whether its your family or not.

I lived with my mom before of course, I always have.

but that doesn't mean I ever liked it. See I have this step dad, his names Scott, large fella. Big nose and at least 9ft tall. (not really) I've known him since i was at least 6, my mom divorced my dad and then married him. He hated me and my sister, and I don't think we will ever know why. But he was indeed abusive.

What was i talking about? why I left. My mom got Vicodin for her tooth a year ago, and some went missing. Well, of course Scott was asked where it had gone, and he said I took it. So she came at me crazy, alllllll week i heard her run her mouth.

So I put my foot down, I had enough of it. It was bad enough putting up with Scott, I moved in with my boyfriend for 6 months.

that ended, so I moved in with my friend Morgan, I ended up being there a month, so I went to Florida. Iv'e stayed with friends and my sisters for weeks sometimes before and after I left. 
I don't really know what my creative writing teacher wants me to write about, 
so I'll speak the truth, but Im gonna go finish making this peacock painting.
It's good to have a home.

    Sometimes I think about how infinite everything really is. If you think about it, we live on a little green globe, covered with lush forests and civilizations that have been being built since as far as history can date back.

we are so small and insignificant.

we'd burn up like a cotton ball if we were any closer to the sun. I'm not much of a religious person, but its crazy to think that this planet was put in the exact place it needed to be in, for life to exist on it. 

What else confuses me, WHY IS GOD TORTURING ME.

I keep finding quarter sized beetles all over my room, chillen all over the place, man. Killed like 6 already tonight. I will never sleep again, But by god I feel like a warrior.

I've been trying to get back into art of course. if you have a piece that you would like me to make, we can Discuss the price, and I will to the best of my ability create the image you are looking for. I will be posting pictures of some of my work soon. 

Its hot, theres bugs everywhere. Im gonna go cry,

Bye for now America.